Shit Stain Panties aka SSP

RIP - Michael Jackson

2009-06-30T23:33:00.003+08:00

Michael Jackson

(29 August 1958 - 25 June 2009)

REST IN PEACE BRO!!!

Cant believe he just died like that....been to his concert in 93 and it still reigns as one of the all time best concerts Singapore has even witnessed!

What is LOVE? Helena

2008-07-15T02:06:00.005+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

If only Helena had tasted like the Helena pizza at the Spizza, I would have loved her to bits.

But she wasn’t. She tasted as bland as plain bread dipped in tap water. She studied engineering, loves weaving, and walking her ugly shitzu.

I was determined to turn her into the dark side, but she was resistant, citing her strict upbringing as an excuse.

It took me two weeks to hit first base, one month for the second and never the third. I finally dropped the virgin like a sack of Burbank potatoes.

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What is LOVE? Gale

2008-07-15T01:46:00.002+08:00

Night/Cooling/Aircon/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

My lust for Gale came as fast as it left. We met at a party last Christmas.

We danced, had a few whiskeys and we started groping. The host, my best friend, was out to screw me. He didn’t come to my rescue. He left me in the lurch, fed me to the wolves, and hung me by the balls.

In my drunken stupor, I remembered Gale to be a slim and leggy woman, with a pair of knockers like watermelons.

When I woke up, Gale cinderella-ed into a fat and ugly leprechaun, and that was by any man’s reasonable standard.

On that day, I swore on my best friend’s life never to drink before I fuck.

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What is LOVE? Felicia

2008-07-15T01:25:00.002+08:00

Night/Cooling/Aircon/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

That name used to turn me on. I thought it meant ORAL SEX until she straightened me out.

I was a pervert she said. It was her fucking fault I said, for having such a suggestive name.

She said it was her mom’s fault.

Anyway, she lived up to her name. She gave the best blowjob. I always came by the fifth blow, inside her mouth, on her small tits, but sometimes on her eyes, by accident.

It was simply awesome.

But I don’t think she had similar reciprocal feelings. I went down on her once, and that was the last.

Her cunt smelt of a rotten rat in the gutter.

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What is LOVE? Esther

2008-05-11T04:54:00.006+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

Esther's mom hated my guts. She said I was a nobody. Her daughter was a swan, and I a toad.

I hated that Bitch, but i loved her daughter. We made great love, in her house, in her swimming pool, in her car, in her mom's bedroom. I never had to pay for anything. She would buy me meals, she would buy me gifts, she would drive me home. We were in love. It was unconditional, but not for her mom.

I told her she had no right to judge me. She told me to fuck off. She stopped me from seeing Esther. She made Esther choose. I was confident.

But Esther chose her.

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What is LOVE? Denise

2008-05-11T04:15:00.003+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

I told Denise I was a player. She said that's alright. Bad Boys turn her on.

One evening, she saw me in her room, fingering her dorm mate. She went berserk, and ran out of the room. I continued with the fingering.

I went to look for Denise after I came. I found her in the common room. She had a broken beer bottle. She said I was a fucking male whore. I was confused. I thought she would be turned on.

she told me to fuck off. She threatened to slit her wrist. I told her I did not come to stop what she was doing. It was just inappropriate to do it in the common room I told her.

Denise lunged at me with the beer bottle, but I managed to outrun her.

Fuck you, Bitch!

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What is LOVE? Cassandra

2008-05-11T03:55:00.003+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

11.30 pm. Arsenal was playing Manchester City in the kitchen.

Then she walked in. She poured herself a cup of water and asked me how was the game. I could not answer. Cassandra only had her white panties on. Her breasts were like winter melons. Her nipples were protruding. It was winter but I felt warmth.

I had never seen an Ang Mor half-naked. She asked if I would like to watch the game in her room. I could not refuse.

I ended up fucking the first Ang Mor in my life. It felt just the same.

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What is LOVE? Belle

2008-05-11T03:31:00.003+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

We were at the departure gate when She gently whispered in my ear.

"I am the only woman who would love a fucking loser like you"

I did not react. I waved Her goodbye and cleared the custom. Maybe she was right, but three years was a long time. She could be wrong.

I did not prove Her right immediately. It was only after 37 bitches when I found that out.

Belle fucked up my love for women.

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What is LOVE? Amy

2008-05-02T02:35:00.004+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

Amy was my first love. She said she knows what love was. She said she loves me. I was only 17.

We went on dates many times. She made me spend money. She made me carry her shopping bags. I paid all the dinners. I bought all the gifts.

I wanted sex I told her. She gave me a peck on the cheek. She said that was better than sex. I believed her. We were in love.

I never fought with Amy, but she always yelled at me. She called me a loser, a fat piece of shit with a gutter breath. But after the yelling, Amy always said to me that to yell was to love. I believed her.

One evening, I dropped by Amy's place. I wanted to surprise her with a gift. At the stairwell landing, I saw Amy holding a guy's cock, masturbating him. I waited till the guy ejaculated.

I walked over and punched Amy in the nose. That was the end of my first love, at 18.

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Icarus

2008-05-02T02:12:00.005+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

I sleep. I wake up. I brush teeth. I shower. I eat breakfast. I change clothes. I take MRT. I work. I eat lunch. I finish work. I take MRT. I eat dinner. I watch porn. I masturbate. I sleep. I wake up. I brush teeth. I shower. I eat breakfast. I change clothes. I take MRT. I work. I eat lunch. I finish work. I take MRT. I eat dinner. I watch porn. I masturbate. I sleep. I wake up. I brush teeth. I shower. I eat breakfast. I change clothes. I take MRT. I work. I eat lunch. I finish work. I take MRT. I eat dinner. I watch porn. I masturbate. I sleep. I wake up. I brush teeth. I shower. I eat breakfast. I change clothes. I take MRT. I work. I eat lunch. I finish work. I take MRT. I eat dinner. I watch porn. I masturbate. I sleep......

I get old, I fall sick, I die.

It's absurd. Fly with me, Icarus!

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Sunny - A Raffles Place Fuck-Up

2008-05-02T01:34:00.006+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

Sunny, by name and not by nature.

A Raffles Place Fuck-Up, that's what they called him. Never fuck around with Sunny or he would have you impaled with a punji stake. An introverted psychopath, nobody messed with Sunny. Or so he thought.

Yesterday morning, Sunny had to put a bullet through his head. That dog-fucked sonofabitch. He had it coming. 15-hour shifts, 7 days' week, and a fuck-up appraisal. A bloody dog life in a nutshell.

But I did right. Worked him hard and gave him shit. Sunny had to go. He didn't belong.

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Page 4 Latino

2008-05-02T00:52:00.006+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

I must confess. I don't know many Latinos. The last was Ricky Martin. And now, you.

The sweaty breasts, the dirty look, the hairy armpits, the unshaven cunt. I like. So fucking raw!

They are right. You never really live until you bone a Latino.

What? Never get fisted by a funny-eye chink before? That's alright bitch. There's always the first.

Now, how about deep throat? No? Cannot? What? My fucking chinky dick's too small? You've got issue bitch.

Chee bye! Now I am pissed. Open your mouth wide and say Ahhh. Swallow every drop and lick it dry cunt.

Nice. That's my girl. I will see you soon but for now, you deserve a dog ear and I'm going to sleep. Goodnight.

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Chick

2008-03-26T23:44:00.005+08:00

Night/Humid/Fan/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

It was a mad rush to the bedroom. Jasbir Singh wasted no time. Under the guise of darkness, he groped senselessly. It was the sensation he had never felt before. It gave him a hard-on. He felt his dick screaming. Oh, what a feeling.

The pair of fresh silicon jugs reminded him of a stress-release massage ball. Soft and bouncy, no matter how hard he squeezed. He groped further, and harder. The ass became firmer, and tighter. Oh, what a feeling.

Jasbir couldn't hold it any longer. He pulled down his pink G-string. Gripping his erected shaft, he gave it a final yank, and shot his load. Oh, what a feeling.

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Knifed!

2008-03-22T03:54:00.005+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

I knifed that bitch yesterday. Two quick successive stabs. She dropped dead.

She'd provoked me. I didn't argue. She wasn't worth it. I just knifed her. Easier. Cleaner.

She wasn't the first. Another fat bitch was knifed last Wednesday. Same issue. Obnoxious. Totally inconsiderate. Five stabs were all it took.

They were at the wrong place, the wrong time. Shouldn't have taken the ECP stupid bitch. It was my road. Should have moved aside. I flashed. I fingered. They told me to pull alongside.

I had no fucking choice.

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M. Nakamura

2008-03-22T03:22:00.005+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

M. Nakamura came last night. She asked if I was seeing other girls. I said no. I asked her why. She said I didn't look her up lately. I was tired I told her. Shit loads of work. The boss was a bitch. M. Nakamura wasn't happy. She said I was cheap.

I said she was the only Japanese girl I know. She became skeptical. There were too many Japanese girls out there. I could be fucking them. Don't be stupid I said. I only want M. Nakamura. I reminded her about my weakness for big breasts.

M. Nakamura smiled. I had an instant hard-on. She reached for my erection. Barely a few strokes, I facialed her. It was messy. It was everywhere.

Soon after I came, M. Nakamura left. I went to bed, after turning off my Mac.

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Rant 5 - Deal or No Deal

2007-05-20T00:58:00.001+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

WTF? Good game show with fuck up contestants. Irritating, obnoxious, and painful to watch, these contestants were a letdown to the show. What shame!

On a positive note, SSP must commend on Adrain Pang and all the models. Great job!

Your Purveyor of Quality Game Shows

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Bolster

2007-05-07T22:39:00.002+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

My girlfriend started to shy away from sex. Perturbed, I asked her if I was doing it wrongly. She assured me that there was nothing wrong.

I wasn't convinced.

I asked her if my penis was too thin. She said no. It was just that I couldn't reach her G-Spot. 'But your bolster can't too!' I defended. She agreed, but said that at least her bolster knows her clitoris. Shortly after, she had sex with her bolster, again.

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My Father

2007-05-07T22:10:00.002+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

My father went to see a doctor this morning. He looked worried, but my mother didn't. In fact, she looked pissed. When my father came home, he has a tube of cream with him.

'What was it for?' I asked.

'Abrasion.'

'Abrasion? Where?'

'Don't ask. It's nothing serious.'

I walked to my mother in the kitchen. She was busy peeling an onion. 'Father said he's got an abrasion.'

'I know.'

'What happened?'

'He masturbated too much.'

At that moment, I felt ill. I locked myself in the bathroom, vomitted my breakfast.

'Both of you are sick!' I heard my mother shrieking outside.

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Ah Ba Ba

2007-05-07T02:38:00.002+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

My cousin was caught glue-sniffing. She was only twelve. The police questioned her. She kept silent. She was deaf and mute.

'Ahh baba...ah ahbaba.'

'What the fuck did you say?'

'Ah bak ah bak..ah bak bak.'

'Sorry? Oh nevermind, you can go now.'

Fortunately, they gave her a stern warning. As they released her, she pointed the middle finger at them. She didn't need their sympathy. What she needed was conversation.

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Gunalan

2007-05-07T02:17:00.002+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

Gunalan was drinking again. I asked him why. He didn't reply. I saw the bottle of whiskey, almost empty. I asked him again. He kept quiet.

We met for dinner. I asked him about the bottle. 'Where was it?'

'I don't know.'

'You must know. It was in your room.'

He stuttered. 'I didn't drink.'

'Then what happened to the bottle?'

'I used it to smash my head.'

'Why?'

'I needed to wake up.'

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Bright Idea - Bridge to Bintan

2007-05-07T01:56:00.001+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

To boost bilateral relations, job opportunities and tourism, SSP suggests building a bridge linking the tiny island to Bintan and Batam. The costs of buidling this bridge should be matched dollar-to-dollar between the two governments and the major stakeholders.

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General Poem 6 - Singapore Dream

2007-05-03T03:27:00.001+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

I want a Condo,
I can't afford one.

I want a Country Club membership,
I can't afford one.

I want a car,
I can't afford one.

I want a credit card,
I can't afford one.

I want cash,
I don't have much.

I want to be rich,
I am not.

I want to be a scholar,
I am a drop-out.

I want to be a Officer,
I am only a driver.

I want to go University,
I only got secondary.

I want to have a perfect body,
I have a big tummy.

I want to have a good job,
I am stuck in a shitty one.

I want to be a yuppy,
I have no money.

I want to eat in fancy restaurants,
I only eat in food courts.

I want to gamble in casinos,
I have no money.

I want to be driven,
I can only take MRT.

I want to have a 50 inch LCD,
I only have a CRT TV.

I want to leave a legacy,
I have only lousy history.

I want to be somebody,
I am a nobody.

I want to be counted,
I am just a digit.

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Bright Idea - Real Training for our Soldiers!

2007-05-03T03:12:00.001+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

To train our Commandos or Special Forces effectively, rotate them to conduct execution of death row convicts in prison. This will steel their balls during war time where killing becomes second nature.

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General Poem 5 - Middle

2007-05-03T02:46:00.001+08:00

Night/Dry/Air-Con/SSP's bedroom in a flat somewhere in the North

I am not fat,
I am not thin.
I am not smart,
I am not dim.

I am not big,
I am not small.
I am not tall,
I am not short.

I am not rich,
I am not poor.
I am not witty,
I am not blur.

I am not a scholar,
I am not stupid
I am not ill,
I am not fit.

I am not here,
I am not there.
I am not mental,
I am everywhere.

I am not hot,
I am not cold.
I am not young,
I am not old.

I am not calm.
I am not nervous.
I am not confused,
I am not focused.

I am not lost,
I am not found.
I am not free,
I am not bound.

I am not angry,
I am not at peace.
I am not bitter,
I am not at ease.

I am not vengeful,
I am not forgiving.
I am not loving,
I am not taking.

I am in the middle,
I am a hamburger.
I am caught in between,
I am a struggle.

I am stuck for life,
I am screwed for good.
I am fucked real nice,
I am suicidal I should.

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A Tribute to Linda Liao

2007-04-23T23:47:00.002+08:00

Night/Dry and Hot like Fuck/Air Con Not On/SSP's living room in a flat somewhere in the North

You look like Fiona Xie.
You sound like Jonathan Leong.
Your pupils are like black goli.
Your teeth are like bunnies.

You are like Joanne Peh
thin like tek-ko
You are like Joanne Peh
sweet like nata de coco.

You speak with an ang mo accent
but it's alright.
Sometimes you look like crap
but that is fine.

Your singing is very good,
almost like Avril Lavigne.
But with those mountain bike gloves
you look like Michael Jackson...Hee Hee.

Your Guru of Love

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